In the journey to learn more about happy marriages and how to handle ours better, we have come to this book: Listen, Learn, Love (shortened for this blog’s purposes) by Susie Miller. At first sight, the book has a very self-explanatory title, and its primary goal is to explain that not mastering these three skills can be a deal-breaker in all types of relationships.
The Review
I’d recommend Listen, Learn, Love to everyone who needs to improve a relationship and has had little (or no) contact with psychology or self-help books. Miller uses simple language and approachable stories from her coaching sessions and family experiences, which are relatable in many cases.
This book is short, and you can get the most out of it in a matter of hours. In 105 pages and six chapters, the author goes deep into learning how to 1) Listen, 2) Learn People, and 3) Love Well. The crucial aspect is that this is not just for romantic relationships. It’s for everyone who feels overwhelmed or frustrated with someone else, whether their parent, sibling, or friend.
The guide is simple to follow, and the tips are actionable. What makes this different, though, is Susie Miller's personal experiences. Her anecdotes are particularly relatable; to some degree, most of us have lived similar situations. I could feel her authenticity through the pages, and as she mentions, these three skills are simple to follow, elegant, and practical.
My Favorite Quotes from Listen, Learn, Love
“In a world where it is so easy to “friend and unfriend,” perhaps we’ve lost sight of what a true relationship is and how to nurture and grow that.” ~ Susie Albert Miller
I declare myself guilty in this part. I’ve lived “permanently” in five different cities/countries in the last seven years. During all these movements, I lost touch with great people because I could not maintain relationships.
What have I learned? Even when facing significant distance and schedule obstacles, I can always send a text or make a short call to remind people that I love them. Simple… but rarely actionable in my case. Pray for me, lol.
“You can kiss your family and friends goodbye and put miles between you, but at the same time, you carry them with you in your heart, your mind, your stomach, because you do not just live in a world, but a world lives in you.” ~ Frederick Buechner
This one hit me hard. I believe we all carry somehow a piece of the places we visit and the people we connect with.
"Everyone wants to be seen, heard, and understood—not necessarily agreed with, but acknowledged and listened to!" ~ Susie Albert Miller
We have pretty much the answers or insights of many things. There's no need to debate when sharing our deepest, most vulnerable selves. It’s enough with listening and validating.
About Susie Albert Miller
Susie Albert Miller is recognized for her expertise in relationship coaching and counseling. Susie's work focuses on providing practical advice and actionable strategies for improving various aspects of relationships, drawing from her own experiences and insights gained from working with clients.
Susie holds an MA and an MDiv and has been featured on Capitol Hill and NPR. As a cancer survivor, she has an optimistic outlook on life, a preference for dark chocolate, good books, and cherished conversations with her family.
About the Author
Luisa Trujillo is one half of Masala. She's a dreamer, believer, and achiever from a cozy coffee farm in Risaralda, Colombia. Being in an intercultural and interreligious relationship with an Indian 16,000 km away since 2019, she has gained a fair bit of insight into love, travel, and culture.
In her other life, Luisa has been a Coffee Grower, Digital Marketer, English as a Foreign Language Teacher, and Translator with a bachelor's degree in Modern Languages. Thanks to the latter, she is now fluent in Spanish, English, and French and has basic knowledge of Portuguese, Japanese, and Russian.
Relationships, coffee, languages, and a thousand miles later, she decided to start a community online to share her experience through Masala of Cultures along with her other half, Aswin.
Luisa's insights can also be found on other parts of the internet, including NVCC.
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